THE ALPHA

For a time I desired to lead the pack 

But not after I knew the burden

Not after I learned that I had to stop living for myself

And start living for a vision

A vision that possibly only I  saw

With my eyes open or closed

A vision that made leadership  scary 

One clear picture of a chain binding to the prison of a possible better future

Built on lashes of bitter sacrifices

Pillared by giving away the possibility of pleasure today for the hope of tomorrow

Hope was the thin thread to hold on to

In the abyss of power

An endless pit hidden beneath a thin membrane of grandiosity and glamour

And a dream for a people with many faces

Faces of friendish fiends looking like starving wolves and marauding vampires

The only gift that kept me human and skeptical of my place

It was a time for me to die for the birth of the slfless I 

Who could live for a people, some of who wished to lynch me for a little taste of power

Which they believed was created to quench their lust

What would happen to my vision?

What would happen to my hope?

Were the two questions that tied me to that smouldering altar of sacrifice

Where flames licked life and love away piece by piece

Depleting my emotions eating away my trust

Strengthening my resolve to trust in the little goodness in the world

Purifying my hope to shine like pure gold free of all dross