Philosopher's Pen

I see you looking at me  I know you wonder how perfect my life is How you wish you had a minute of my existance How you would glide on the nineth cloud may be higher I see you look at me  But I wish to tell you that I also wonder how i have survived this  intensive care unit I call existance I have also wondered how breath has clung to this bones I wonder how I made it to twenty two When every minute of that breath I feelt like a stranger to my self Always feeling like running a way from my body  Lost in my own skin Scared like a mouse but I had to keep a brave face I wish to tell you I understand the feeling of terror in the face of conversations I am very familiar to the long the heart to stop beating I am well vast with the feeling of the thread of judgy gods holding a soul to life And insufficient conviction of afterlife pursuading the mind to hold on a little longer All in all, I have been on delicate life support of a whimsical desire to succeed And the need to help someone cross